Picture Walls

my mom actually has a picture wall in our house and i've always liked them...i on the other hand would probably do all black and white or something funky lol.

another day...

first...some more art





so far today was been an awesome day. my mom and i have spent the entire day together and it's really made me happy. along with our busy schedules we never have a lot of time to spend quality time together. we had lunch, went shopping, and i showed her some projects in the works. on top of all that...after taking a shower i received a very sweet good morning message:)

so later on this evening i'm meeting my aunt again...this time at starbucks:) we have another al-non meeting to attend. this time i'm hoping i won't be too shy or scared to talk. i know that once i do i'll be relieved and more comfortable. the people at these meetings are so supportive and i really hope to stay in contact with some of them. it's so amazing that not only me but everyone else that go to these meetings care about everyone else like i do...they are willing to help other people and be a shoulder to lean on when they don't necessarily know the person like that. i've always been some what ashamed to tell people the real deal and what really goes on in my house. now i'm realizing that i need to talk to people about it and try to open up to people...i'm not saying that i'm gonna tell everybody my business but people that i know will care and really listen to what i have to say. it's been very few people in the past...but certain people that i'm with or have a relationship with at this point in time i've been able to open up to. i can't know for sure if they really care and are willing to listen but i hope some part of them does. there are friends/significant others that i miss a lot and i can't wait to see them again. i'm thinking this summer will be huge for me...i'm not gonna say i'm starting fresh but things will be a bit different. so we'll see!

even though this week is my spring break, i'm staying busy...whats new lol. i've got al-non meetings tonight and possibly throughout the week, therapist tomorrow (never been to see one before...kinda nervous), hair appointment lol, work on upcoming projects, regular work, and other meetings. also, i'm trying to move into a house soon. i looked at one today that was so cute...it was very modern and funky...love it. it was a 2 bedroom, 1 bath, kitchen, small basement, and living room. it was small but the perfect size for me and my future puppy lol. i'm hoping it all works out.

oh and the best part of the day...i finally dropped the top:)

Al Non and more

Today's reminder:

When I am able to accept the help of my higher power, it makes me feel capable of doing anything I am called upon to do. I am overcomoing my fears. I am acquiring a comfortable new confidence.

"Courage is fear that has said its prayers."


so tonight i went to my first al-non meeting. these meetings are for people that grew up in alcohalic environments...because of my dad's situation i felt like i needed to attend at least one to see what it was like. so my aunt took me to my first one tonight and i've learned so much already. i never thought that 50+ people could be in the same situation at me and relate to me that much...and i've never met these people. most of them were 21 and up so i was one of the youngest...i didn't say much because i wanted to observe and listen most of the time. it was one of those things where you go around and say "i'm lindsay" and everyone says, "hi lindsay" haha that always makes me laugh. but tonight i've learned to worry about myself more...not worry about what everyone else needs and how everyone else feels and focus on me for once. not that i'm going to be some selfish bitch now lol...i'm always going to be considerate and kind towards others but i'm not going to do too much for other people anymore. one of the sponsors said something that really made sense. he said, "it took me a while to realize that my daughter has a disease and that there is a person underneath it all, she's just really sick. so when she acts a certain way or says all these mean and hateful things...it's the alcohalic talking. i will never forget the day that she was so drunk that she could barely stand up and she gave me this look and that's when i knew she really wanted my help and all my anger went away." i think that at some point all of my anger could go away...but from the looks of things now, it isn't happening. they have to want help and you can't force them or try and convince them. they say that alcohalics drink to ease pain but at some point the pain will over shine that quick fix. so the meeting went fabulous and i will be going to more...

also, i'm going to alabama this weekend...the deep south lol. i'm so excited because i haven't seen my besty in foreverrrr!! i've never been before either but from what she's told me it's wild lol. i'm so pumped and i'm glad her and whitney will be here during the summer.

here is the "signs of spring" collection...i love these






random...

yep it's mine except she's white instead of orange. she's getting a new paint job next week:) can't wait for hot weather...